9: 2020, a shared retrospective
Rounding up all the things we don't hate (including you, dear reader!)
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The never-ending year is finally coming to an end. We doubt anyone would disagree with us when we say that we will not miss 2020 and would be more than happy with it making an Irish goodbye. We’ve spent a good amount of time covering the hate-able so far, but one could (and will) argue that doing so was a sensible response to the state of the world as of late. Yet, as sentimental souls, we can’t resist the opportunity to attempt to end this year of correspondence on a brighter note. With the close of the year comes the impulse to reflect on what carried us through this strange time in our lives. We’re leaning into that impulse, hoping to highlight some of our fondest memories and focus in solely on Things We Don’t Hate. We hope you’ll join us and take the time to consider what has brought meaning to your life in a year that has provided so little in return.
But before we do so, we just want to say thank you to all of you. To anyone and everyone who has read, subscribed, reached out, or supported us in any manifestation as we undertook this joint writing project: thank you so much. You have imbued this shared practice with meaning, made us feel heard, and reminded us that we aren’t alone in the midst of a very isolating year. The support we’ve received has encouraged us to write on and write harder than we have in a long, long time—both in this space and outside of it. We can’t thank you enough for that. All we ask is that you continue hanging out with us once a week: same time, same place. We will be going on a ~holiday hiatus~ given that Anna has not seen her family in over a year and the both of us want to be as present as possible when spending time with our loved ones these next few weeks. Thanks, We Hate It will return to its regularly scheduled programming on Wednesday, January 6th. Again, we’re grateful for your patience, support, and readership. You, dear reader, are one of the most significant Things We Don’t Hate.
Haley’s List:
The girl reading this <3
My Reebok Club C 85 Model Vintage sneakers. I am currently a very restrained appreciator of sneakers, moving beyond favorites like Vans and Converse to forge a healthy and devoted relationship with Reebok Classics. I purchased these bad boys to serve as a comfortable and clean work shoe for my bookselling job and I’ve been in love ever since, wearing them every day I possibly can. They are the most supportive, breathable, and versatile summery sneakers I’ve come across.
Green smoothies have become such an important part of my diet that it’s kind of embarrassing. Pandemic-related malaise has really taken a knock to my food-related effort and inspiration, so I’ve filled that sad chasm with blended fruit and spinach! They’re a super low-effort and tasty way for me to take in fruits and greens even when I don’t feel like it. I also enjoy experimenting a bit in the low-stakes sphere of smoothie-making. Most recently, I added orange sherbet to my strawberry-banana-spinach-orange juice combo and it was obviously a winner.
Nong’s Thai Cuisine is my #1 takeout choice in COVID times. Their pad see ew is everything to me. I genuinely thank the gods, etc. that there is good Thai food close to my hometown. Minnesotans, please support Nong’s if you haven’t!
Fort Snelling State Park. This recommendation is Minnesota-specific, but wow have I really had a nice time at this place. This year, with time outdoors all the more precious given how often we’re inside, I’ve gone back twice. Both times I’ve walked the Pike Island Loop, which leads to a beachy outcropping where the Minnesota and Mississippi Rivers converge. On a busy day, it’s a great trail for dogspotting. On a quieter day, there are so many opportunities to see active deer and birds in the park. Regardless of capacity, you get to take in a beautiful landscape full of fallen and live trees, traces of busy beavers at work, and fresh air all in the middle of the Twin Cities. The drive to the visitor center alone is worth the $7 vehicle permit. Just gorgeous stuff. Looking forward to exploring it more.
Facebook Memes. I’m not gonna elaborate. You either find these funny or you don’t—and honestly, it’s probably better if you don’t, so worry not <3
The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim became the video game to carry me through pandemic times—a feat I thought would be fully shouldered by Animal Crossing: New Horizons. I bought Skyrim for the Switch after I was laid off from my job because the mindset was very much “WHY NOT?!?” at that point. I’ve surprised myself with the roles I like playing best. I went in thinking I would play as a full-on warrior, slashing up enemies with a sword. I've found instead that I love picking off people from afar as a sneaky archer, hate magic and alchemy, and enjoy stealing more than I ever thought I would. As someone who can be a bit of a perfectionist and worry about playing games “right,” Skyrim is really freeing because you can truly do whatever the hell you want in whatever way you want and take as long as you want. A never-ending game for a never-ending pandemic.
Saying “LET’S F***ING GOOOOOOOO!” or “LFG.” Those closest to me have borne witness to the positive power a simple LFG can bring to any conversation. Like most patterns in my speech, this began as an ~ironic choice~ and is now a genuinely welcome form of support I look forward to both giving and receiving.
McDonald's :( This is probably very interrelated with my COVID-era distaste for food, but it’s going on the list for the sake of honesty. My local Mickey-D’s has very much gotten me through pandemic times. There were days where all I wanted was a #9 meal with a Dr. Pepper and the thought of getting a Sausage McMuffin with hashbrowns had me setting an alarm just to make it to the golden arches in time for breakfast. Yes, I always face post-McDonald’s clarity. As such, I have paid my penance, and I think I am finally forging a healthier relationship with McDonald’s defined by scarcity. Less is more.
Driving! Real ones will know that I have only had my driver’s license for a year and a half. I do not claim to be a good driver and the act of driving can still make me pretty anxious at times, but I have found that I love road trips and aimless night drives and cry-driving away from my problems. This year, I've processed a lot of heavy stuff during time spent alone in my car with just my playlists to accompany me. Having the freedom to distance yourself from what’s bothering you and take that time and space to eventually come to terms with it has truly been a game-changer. Cue “CR-V” by Cuco.
Oberg Mountain Trail. Another Minnesota-specific rec! Sorry outsiders! Oberg Mountain has been a big favorite of the McNiff family for as long as we’ve been going up north to the Grand Marais area each summer (so forever). It’s a 3 mile hike that offers countless beautiful overlooks for just moderate work. I’m including it on this list because I would recommend it to anyone and it really was a place of respite in my life this year. I was lucky enough to hike the mountain twice in 2020: once in the summer with my entire family and again in the fall with my mom. My mom and I had never been fortunate enough to see the colors change in northern Minnesota during the fall, so we drove up for the day on a whim. It was a necessary change of pace in a picturesque setting, but beyond that, it was invaluable quality time spent with her when I really needed it most.
This Susan Sontag quote:
…women are taught to see their bodies in parts, and to evaluate each part separately.
When I tell you this quote has been lodged in the forefront of my mind since I read it in May…! Facing this hard truth has really pushed me to work harder to look at my body as a whole—as something that works as a complete unit to keep me healthy and living—instead of fixating on small, separate components for whatever cosmetic reason. Being more utilitarian in terms of how I view my body and striving to see myself as a whole rather than as a collection of parts has been a nice change, and I trace much of that mindful thinking back to this quote.
This Masahide haiku:
Since my house burned down,
I now own a better view
of the rising moon.
Anna’s List:
Bordeaux. The only time I left Southeastern England this year was on the precipice of the eruption of the pandemic in Europe at the end of February. I had planned to make the most of my time in the United Kingdom and try to do some cheap-ish weekend trips around Europe throughout 2020, but those plans were quickly dashed. I am so thankful I was able to go when I did with my friends Jill and Mario – we meandered, laughed, and drank lots of good wine. If you’re ever there, I highly recommend visiting the city’s wine museum, Cité du Vin. Genuinely one of the most well-done museums I’ve been too.
This poem by one of my favs, Ada Limón. When the world felt like it was imploding a little bit, this consoled me.
In case I haven’t drilled it through everyone’s skulls yet, I got my master’s from LSE this year! It was not at all the year I had envisioned. In January I wrote and handed in my summative essays, then classes resumed as normal for a while. I moved completely online in mid-March, attending classes virtually, writing my second round of summative essays in my boyfriend’s bedroom, and finally writing my dissertation and handing it in early September. It wasn’t until my dissertation was turned in that I stepped foot on campus once again. I will be honest, I am a little heartbroken that the year I had so looked forward to morphed into this. Through no fault of anyone, except perhaps the government, I don’t think I got the most out of my time at LSE that I could have. It’s an opportunity I won’t have again, and it was squandered in many ways. But I am still so grateful for the months I did get to enjoy in London, and all the lovely people I met here who made this pandemic a bit more bearable. At the end of the day, I not only finished the degree, but actually did work that I am proud of. In these circumstances, that’s more than I could hope for.
Walks — a lockdown staple. Some of the best conversations I had this year happened on long walks in the English countryside with my boyfriend. Every weekend, he would bring me to a new spot in the Garden of England and we would make the most of our government-approved outside time.
I consumed an ungodly amount of pasta this year. I nervously await the day when I get sick of it, but until then it is my dinnertime savior. Pantry pastas, in particular, came in handy when I was low on either fresh produce or effort. These dishes rely on things that you tend to keep on-hand throughout the year. Spaghetti aglio e olio is a classic, using just olive oil, garlic, and red pepper flakes to create a simple sauce that is enriched by a ladleful of pasta water. I also enjoyed Alison Roman’s caramelized shallot pasta (subbing anchovies with miso and capers or vegan fish sauce), pasta al limone, and pasta e ceci.
My inbox is always a really scary place (20,000 emails and counting) and I decided to make it even harder to manage by subscribing to a plethora of newsletters. Though they’ve been around for a little bit, they seem to have boomed during the pandemic. My all-time favorites are From the Desk of Alicia Kennedy, Maybe Baby, and Culture Study. For those of you interested in food, check out Vittles, In Digestion, SOURCED, and Stained Page News. If you’re a doomscroller, consider daily current events newsletters like Axios or theSkimm that present you with a digestible amount of news every morning so you don’t have to go searching for it on the dark hellhole that is known as Twitter.
My friends threw me a very special little birthday gala via Zoom. The few times I got to dine out were very special. One of the best meals I had this year was at Mao Chow in Hackney, just weeks before London locked down. It’s a tiny vegan Sichuanese restaurant that makes up for its lack of seats with enormous, bright flavors. If you are ever in London and at all inclined toward vegetarian eating, GO. Other favorites this year: Padella and Oowee Diner.
This playlist, which is the musical manifestation of a comfort object. Lots of favorites from my childhood and adolescence that cheer me up.
A longtime Converse wearer, I wanted to expand my sneaker collection this year. The Veja Esplar trainers in black and white have successfully filled that spot in my wardrobe and been my go-to shoe this year.
Over the years, I’ve followed shows here and there but would not have have called myself an avid TV watcher. That changed very quickly this year, when being stuck inside on the weekend basically required watching TV. In January my sister and I started on a high note and sped through The End of the F***ing World (their asterisks, not mine) — cannot recommend enough. Other stand-outs from this year include La Casa de Papel (Money Heist), Killing Eve, Normal People, The Great, Sex Education, Unorthodox, and The Queen’s Gambit. Some of these — particularly La Casa de Papel and Killing Eve — were hard to watch at times when I just wanted to watch something light and breezy and got dark and uneasy instead, but they were also some of the best. For the days when I really couldn’t handle anything remotely heavy, I leaned on Catastrophe, New Girl, Élite, and, of course, Emily in Paris.
A bit of a niche one, but this pap pic of Paul Mescal brought me an inordinate amount of joy this spring. The outfit bangs, the snack selection is elite (prawn cocktails crisps and pink G&Ts? A man of taste), and he overall is just nice to look at. 10/10.
While I haven’t met her yet, my family adopted a new puppy named Gigi. Watching her grow up over FaceTime has been a bright spot during my 2020, even if I wish I could have witnessed it firsthand.
Since high school, I’ve worn makeup many more days than not. Even if I didn’t go full-on, I still felt a bit vulnerable without some eyebrow pencil or tinted moisturizer. 2020 has been liberating in its seclusive nature. With the lockdowns, masks, and distancing, I have ditched makeup for most of this year. To not only accept but appreciate my bare face in the mirror for the first time in a long time has been a blessing.
So that’s it for 2020! Again, thank you so much for reading and engaging with us these past few months. Be back soon!
Much love,
Haley and Anna